So...having passed my test but still owning no more than a pair of motorcycle gloves, it was time to get some clothing in preparation for buying the bike. I was advised that the best way to get affordable clothing was at one of the motorcycle shows and decided to go to the one at the Bath & West Showground. That idea was scuppered when I realised that it wasn't until the spring so we decided to go the International Motorcycle and Scooter Show at the NEC in November.
The NEC was a place I'd heard of but not seen yet, the car-parks are the size of a small county and there is a definite feeling that you are buying a season ticket, not just the parking place for a day, at £8.
The place is huge so the first thing is to catch the bus to the exhibition halls. No queue to get in on a Wednesday so we are straight in, looking at a huge hall full of the manufacturers main stands. The main manufacturers were all there, Suzuki, Yamaha, Honda, Kawasaki, Benelli, Ducati, Triumph, Harley Davidson, BMW etc plus a few others such as the newer names from the far-east, not yet familiar. We wandered round, frankly a bit bewildered and identified a few familiar models and did the 'big kid' thing of sitting on them and trying their positions. Showed Lynne the modern edition of the Suzuki I had passed my test on and also showed her a Honda Transalp which is a bike I am considering buying. We sat on a few totally enormous bikes, some of which seemed less than practical, and Lynne insisted on getting on behind me (two big kids)
There were displays of 'custom' bikes which were breathtaking works though, in line with my dis-interest in bicycle machinery, I admired them without the least inclination to own one or emulate the achievement. One particularly extreme 'chopper' had a large crowd round it, none of whom seemed too bothered about the drive chain running along under the thigh of the rider. I've always been attached to these legs and I thought it was a bad idea in general. That's just what you need at the International Motorcycle and Scooter Show, some kill-joy who hates being chopped up by a chain.
Off to one side of this hall was another huge room holding some of the larger displays, mini-moto racing, a skills testing area run by Buell and most interestingly a Wall of Death! Lynne was off in it's direction like a shot, no stopping her. To her it was 'sole reason for visit'.
The Wall of Death is small, obviously small enough to be towed from place to place in a lorry. We had to pay £2.50 each for entry to this circus-like side-show and on entry we found ourselves looking down from a cat-walk into a wooden cylinder about 20 feet across and about 20 feet high. At the bottom were three motorbikes.
When enough people had filled the show, a slightly-built blond girl appeared through a hole in the Wall and started up one of the bikes, deafening with almost no silencer and in such a confined space. Suddenly she was away, riding around and up the wooden fillet at the edge that made a gradual change between the flat floor and the vertical barrel-vaulting of the Wall. Then you were aware that she was doing the 'impossible', riding on a totally vertical surface, blipping the throttle and going from top to bottom of the Wall on every lap, so close to the top that you had to remove your fingers from the edge of the track as she passed by. Each pass shook the structure; you were very aware of the weight of bike and rider passing right past your stomach. My initial reaction was that she looked like a rag-doll. With no helmet, her hair was streaming out behind in the wind and she was shaken as her bike passed over the planking. This was because the bikes were a bit rigid, having no suspension and probably very hard tyres. Yes that's right - no helmet, but it got madder before it finished. A young man took her place on another bike and did more or less the same stunts though at greater speed and with even more alarming shaking of the Wall of Death.
I pointed out a steel wire running round the top of the wall and said to Lynne "What do you think that wire is for?"
"To catch the riders and keep your hands out of harm's way" she said.
"Er, no" I corrected her "It's to stop the wall bursting!"
The next rider was an older man and just when I thought it couldn't be madder, it got madder. This guy stood up and rode with no hands, climbed over the handlebars and sat at the front of the bike, stood on his 'chain-stay' and waved as he passed by, riding 'no-handed' and generally doing things I could not do if the bike was on it's stand in a car-park.
There was an interlude while the girl drove a buggy car round the wall, noisy and mad but nothing compared to the finale, a few laps with ALL THREE riders riding round three abreast. The whole thing must have been about 15 minutes of noisy unforgettable craziness - fifteen minutes when I don't think I breathed once. I was simply stunned into silence. (There are some who would say this too is quite impossible)
We went and sat in another part of the hall then and let our ears have a rest while we ate our sandwiches (food at the show comes with a Securicorp guard - or at least at that price it should!) and watched the Buell skills riding. Felt that I could have done better than a couple of the riders I watched but a Buell is a wildly powerful bike so I doubt it really.
My purpose in visiting the show was to buy clothing. I visited a few stands and tried on a couple of crash helmets. It's very hard to actually know what you get for your extra money but everyone says "Don't buy a cheap one - you can't put a price on your head" I remain a bit unconvinced that the £600 helmets work 10 times better than the £60 helmets. Certainly there will be a diminishing return with great spending. That said I bought a helmet for...quite a lot of money. I put my credit card where my mouth is and effectively put a value on my head ( "What; it's worth THAT much?" ) I bought a Shoei, a well respected make, but last year's model so well discounted. Then we found a stall selling 'water damaged' clothing from a shop which had been flooded in the summer. Couldn't find anything wrong with the boots and trousers I purchased at bargain prices. Think about it - waterproof trousers that are discounted as water damaged stock. Is it me, or is there something rather strange about that?
Watched a rather dire dance sequence on the 'Black Horse' stage with some questionable characters of indeterminate sexuality prancing around in some odd clothing as well as some very good motorcycle gear. More entertaining watching the faces of the people in the audience, trying to keep from guffawing out loud.
There was still time to eat an outrageously fattening Greek Yoghurt and Honey ice-cream and have a look at a few more bikes including a Kawasaki that felt as if it's saddle was made of old house-bricks. The average leather bicycle saddle is surely no harder.
Then it was time to head south into the worsening weather and by the time we got back to Wiltshire it was teeming with rain.
We later learned that one of my friends met with an accident whilst riding home from the show and his bike had continued on down the hill after unshipping it's rider and felled a tree, 'totalling' the bike in the process. Hoping to hear that he is well again. He has had some time off work as a result with bruises in places not fit to be describe in a public blog...
